Videos

I keep thinking I should get back in to writing on here really, but then when it comes to it you’re faced with a massive blank white box.  There’s lots of interesting things going off – the World Cup is about to kick off, and that means there’s always lots of people getting offended that somebody might get offended by St George’s flags (in reality I suspect nobody does), largely thanks to the gutter press getting simple people riled up, and the people in questions being – frankly – morons.

Having said that, it’s helped me clear out my Facebook list – a useful filter was to delete people (and there was a depressingly large number of them) who sent me invites to groups devoted to “Stop pubs banning football shirts” or “Stop them foreigners stopping us put our flags up”.  It gets on my nerves something rotten – maybe it’s because I’m not especially patriotic – but then, I don’t begrudge those who are, and don’t think the average ethnic minority on the street does either.

Pah.  I like the World Cup but do struggle to motivate myself quite to the level I do for domestic football – certainly I’ll be watching England’s games and probably a few of the other tasty fixtures too, but, well… it’s just not Forest for me, I’m afraid.  Plus it’s a handy defence mechanism to limit expectations to avoid disappointment, something that being a Forest fan is perfect practice for.  Personally I don’t think England are good enough to challenge really – I predict the customary quarter final exit.

The other inevitable byproduct of an international football tournament is the endless tenuous advertising campaigns hung on the back of them, which is largely tedious and boring – however, the resurrection of the ‘John Barnes Rap’ from the 1990 New Order song ‘World in Motion’ for Mars is a stroke of genuis – although Barnsey perhaps should’ve held out for cash rather than being paid in Mars Bars!  See for yourself:

On the flip side, there has also been a significant crime against music committed by the third re-hash of the Lightning Seeds/Baddiel & Skinner song ‘Three Lions’ – I’m not even going to link to it, because it will make you want to stick knitting needles in your ears and take a cheese grater to your eyeballs.  Whoever thought that was a good idea wants locking up!

The final mood-getter-inner we’ve been indulging in at work – as well as the ubiquitous sweepstake (I got Germany) is collecting the Panini World Cup stickers.  There are 638 of these badboys to gather (might even be 640 if you count 00 and 000).  Six or so of us are sharing an album and having gone on a campaign of purchasing, we’ve entered the ‘swap phase’ and currently have only four stickers left to acquire (I believe – some are in transit).

I can’t say the experience has quite equated to my childhood memories but then I only recall having one domestically based football sticker album as a kid – amongst my peers the vogue was bizarrely World Wildlife Fund stickers, as well as Beano/Dandy ones.  Maybe Star Wars too.  Certainly Google Docs, Facebook and Twitter have made the experience a lot more efficient in tracking down swaps!

Other than that I can think of very little to write about aside from something I can’t go in to details over, but I picked up a phone call earlier in the week which was both a complete surprise and immensely exciting, but I’m sworn to a degree of secrecy about the details.  So, one or two readers who bother their arses to read these posts, you shall have to wait and see what I’m going to be up to…

Every now and then I cower and
I need to find empowerment,
Empowerment is paramount
to how I can begin to mount,
A plan that I can implement
to make a dent on ignorance,
Instead of drunk belligerence
and the dissidence of miscreants.

Yesterday I saw Dan le Sac vs Scroobius Pip play at the Rescue Rooms (thanks to a kind birthday pre- amazing.  But anyway, I shall leave as I started, enjoy!

Prodigy rocked, Doncaster Dome – less than impressive venue.  Didn’t spooil it though – ears were ringing for 20 odd hours after the gig!  The mix of age ranges present a stark reminder of how long the Prodigy have been doing the rounds – folks older than me (yes, really!) often sporting t-shirts from tours I was too young for, but also loads of young’uns enamoured with their current (excellent) material.

A video (recorded by somebody else) that gives a hint of proceedings.. probably burned more calories moshing and being swept all around the place than I would’ve done playing football, which is what I’d ordinarily be doing on a Thursday night.

I’d planned on keeping a low profile this Children in Need, but no, guess who took the first call?

Hmm yeah, this blogging thing isn’t really proving to be a massively compelling pasttime is it?  So what have I been up to since the start of September when I stopped briefly by to post some badly re-written lyrics?

Well, quite a bit I guess.  Lots of watching Forest – who are doing rather well at the moment, which is always a bonus to my general sense of wellbeing!  We celebrated Rich‘s 30th birthday with a couple of surprise events which was all rather successful – yet strangely hard to organise.  I’m hoping he steers clear of any plans for my 40th as I can’t be arsed with organising stuff like that again!

Rich and I also made a discovery that going to see ZZ Top was much more than the novelty we hoped it would be – they genuinely rocked.  We popped down to London via car then Tube and took in a tour of Wembley Stadium before wandering over to the Wembley Arena to see the gig.  First up were Steel Panther, below is a sample of what was on offer from the shamelessly cheesy metallers…

This is lead guitarist ‘Satchell’ executing the most spectacularly indulgent guitar solo I’ve ever seen, sadly the clip ends before he gets behind the drumkit and starts pedalling away along with the various well known riffs he was cycling through.  Strangely compelling though.

As for the main act, they were just bloody brilliant.  Starting with Bluesy numbers that made their name back in the seventies, they progressed through to the more familiar mid-eighties tracks that Rich and I were familiar with from Dad’s old LP’s.  The aged rockers certainly still know how to rock – indeed, it was ace to discover latterly than guitarist Billy Gibbons travelled to the gig on the Tube! (Sadly not the same line as Rich and I).

Here’s a sample of ZZ Top in action that night, covering a classic Hendrix track:

Perhaps does them a disservice by linking a cover version since they have such a plethora of their own material that was completely awesome too, so in that spirit I shall add a final video link to one of their own very famous songs.

So that was Wednesday last week, after hotfooting it immediately up to Nottingham after the gig the following day – as we were both off work – Cat and I headed on off to Leicestershire to the terribly-websiteded Tropical Birdland.  It’s a fun place with loads of ace parrots, many of which are free to roam at will and interact with visitors.  One particular Cockatoo took a shine to me before starting to savage my head randomly.

Thoroughly recommended though.  Indulgently we stayed in a hotel overnight before heading home the following day via Twycross Zoo.  Which is always ace, particularly when The Gibbons Are Restless.  Lots of photos of these adventures on Facebook, and this amusing video of the Gibbons making a right royal racket!

… and that’s it really!  See you in a few more months, whoever you mysterious folks are who read this blog!

It does exactly what it says on the tin!

Too lazy and uninteresting to blog.  I’ve spent an obscene amount of time and cash on following Forest this season – most recently in Cardiff, Wales, where thanks to Mike’s hospitality I encountered the song below, which I really like.

I’ve also started Twittering.  I’m not sure why, perhaps it is something which comes naturally living in a house full of cockatiels?  It’s strangely absorbing though, for no particular reason – I imagine it will last not all that long, I might add an RSS feed to the blog.

Click here to find me on there.

It will be rubbish, but let's embrace it and enjoy!

I’m not a big fan of the Olympics in general, but have had my interest aroused by talk of – shock horror – a British sporting success story, as well as characters such as Bolt and Phelps performing seemingly super-human acts with consumate ease; although I’ll still never quite grasp why making horses walk sideways, BMX riding and beach volleyball (for all its probably viewing rating enhancing properties) are classified as Olympic sports.  But still.

Anyway, today it came to a close – and as the next hosts, it was the job of the Best of British to receive the Olympic flag which had been so expertly hosted by China (ignoring all the political stuff, let’s face it, it was a bloody spectacular event).  We marked this with a bus, on which was carried David Beckham, Leona Lewis (who I’d never heard of before) and Jimmy Page.  Of course, Bumbling Boris Johnson was also present as the Mayor of London, and basically, the result was – well, probably not quite as embarrassing as the games themselves will be.

Since China ‘won’ the Olympics thanks to their superb haul of medals, and an idle conversation today before lunch at Cat’s folks, in order to give Team GB the best possible chance to get the best tally of medals in the next Olympics (and upset the whinging Aussies further – I thought we were supposed to be whinging poms!), we need to introduce a number of new sports into the Olympics forthwith…

• Cheese rolling – ship all our competitors most promising athletes from any disciple over to Coopers Hill in Gloucestershire and make them run after a double Gloucester from the top.  The Team GB competitors from nearby Brockworth will have mastered the technique and take the gold, silver and bronze medals – the bemused foreign competitors will amass injuries so severe that there will be no chance at all of them competing in their preferred events.
• Bog Snorkelling – a contribution from our Welsh contingent, for those Olympians hardy enough to have dealt with the plummet down Coopers Hill, the opportunity to contract all manner of gastric infections by completing two lengths of a 60 yard trench cut out of a Welsh peat bog.  In doing this, they must wear a snorkel, mask and flippers – and not use any conventional swimming strokes – so Phelps will be screwed!
• De-badging – something for the Essex team to consider – each country is presented with an S reg Vauxhall Astra from which they must remove the badges identifying either the make or model of the car, the team that does so within the alloted time and without leaving any visible marks will be the winner.  This could, in future Olympics, be extended the include the replacing of walnut-themed dashboards, the installation of neon or LED based superfluous lighting as well as installation of unconvincing looking ‘sporty’ body kits or low-profile alloy wheels.
• Darts – let’s face it, it’s just time, isn’t it?  We could have a pub-sport decathlon involving a pool match followed by a variant on fencing involving pool cues, make use of the countless abandoned skittle alleys around the country, who can win the jackpot fastest on the bandit – followed by an intense session on the ‘who wants to be a Millionnaire’ quiz machine.  Before the decathlon is allowed to end in a dignified game of dominos however, there would need to be rounds of drinking games involving clothes pegs, golf balls, a funnel and a tube and topped off by a yard-of-Ale challenge.
• Shin Kicking – is already a proud staple of the Cotswald Olimpicks.  Long have football fans such as myself decried the mincing nancy-boys who litter our once beautiful game with theatrical diving under the slightest of contact from their opponents.  Well no longer, let us shed football from the Olympic billing and replace it with this, it will be much more entertaining – particularly if it is the footballers who we insist upon competing!!
• Sports Day – we decided that the ‘lite athetics’ we inflict on youngsters is perhaps dismissed all too soon as we march on towards adulthood, so we would like to see events like the egg and spoon race, the sack race (which is, according to Wikipedia, a former Olympic sport already!), most definitely the skipping race and it would definitely be prudent to include the three-legged race, where people from the Isle of Man are sure to be a runaway success!  It would also be amusing to have the Dad’s race and get the competitors fathers to compete in a 100 yard dash!  Unlike current day sports days, winners will be celebrated, losers will be summarily ridiculed.

I think these few ideas could start to swing the balance of 2012 into our favour, and very much keep in the games with the level of dignity and seriousness with which I expect the ceremonies and suchlike will manage to achieve!  Of course, one thing that it is vitally important that we include in the 2012 Olympics is “Ping Pong”, because it was invented in 19th Century Britain.  In fact, any event we opt to include is relevant because all sport was invented by Britain.  I shall leave you with this statement by Boris Johnson to clarify any confusion I may have caused.

Let’s face it folks, it’s gonna be embarrassing – we might as well just sit back and embrace it, and attempt to enjoy it!  And from my own personal point of view, and not for the first time, be extremely grateful that I don’t live in the nation’s capital.

I accidentally clicked on the ‘view videos of me’ on Facebook thing; and found these two amusing clips from Children in Need last year which made me chuckle.  Basically I spent the day dressed as Chewbacca for, well, if you had the chance, you just would, wouldn’t you? 🙂

And the grande finale…

Now I’m convinced the first clip actually shows Mikey beating me fairly convincingly – so for me to have reached the final was somewhat of a travesty; but perhaps justice was served, because I’m not entirely convinced that I didn’t cross that finish line first!  But t’was for a good cause!

Now, I ain’t no prude… quite the opposite in general – but this advert popped on to telly the other night and flummoxed me completely.  It’s disturbing.  Disturbing and wrong.  Isn’t it?  This is actually the French version, but the one I saw was pretty much the same.

In other news I spent around 20 hours frantically turning the house upside down because I thought I’d lost Rich‘s season ticket, which I’ve taken charge of whilst he’s busy in between Russia and Mongolia (with no car now!)… it transpires that it had somehow fallen from the chest of drawers upon which it was residing, and ended up lodged between two of the drawers.  The only way I discovered this was a last ditch desperate measure of taking the back off the chest of drawers.

Forest, being the customer-centric robbing bastards that they are, would have made me (or Rich, but obviously I would have paid him!) pay for the full cost of the season ticket (less one game, as I wouldn’t have told them ’til after tomorrow) had it been lost.  Most other clubs just charge a nominal administrative fee, which is fair enough.  Robbing bastards.